Welcome to eModelMagazine.Com - The Internet's Premier Swimsuit Sports

That Time of the Year for Football Fans
By Arnie Weisberg

“The time has come,” the Walrus said…

Yes, it’s THAT time again. The teams from the AFC and NFC have won their conferences and who really cares except for the football fans from those two cities? (For the record: Pittsburgh and Seattle. How many people do you think are going to remember that in a year or two?) Now we get to listen to two weeks of hype from the print and broadcast media that dwarfs the ink and air space given to the political conventions. Ever wonder about our priorities?

Let’s get back to the Walrus. He’s my friend who’ll be spending the time before the game organizing his annual Super Bowl bacchanalia. There’s a lot to be done: develop the menu, come up with the guest list, and make a schedule for the actual day.

What to bring: the keg (what brand and how many?); the appetizers (chips and dip as well as Buffalo Wings with mild sauce for the pussies and hot sauce for The Men); the main course (burgers and brats); side dishes (more chips and, of course, beans so The Men can be men); and dessert (another keg, what else?).

Now for the guest list. In order to be included in the Walrus’s inner circle, you have to be able to explain simple things like a 3-4 defense or the West Coast offense. You have to be able to recognize when a blitz is coming and know when the QB is calling an audible. You have to know the latest Vegas line on the game. There’s a written test with a few more questions. The winner is awarded the most prestigious prize the Walrus can offer: first pick of seats in front of his 60” HDTV and being served by the person who scores the lowest. The Walrus’s cousin, Bronco, has won the coveted prize more times than Mike Ditka has lost his temper. Numbers, Walrus’s accountant friend who can add in his head faster than T.O. can embarrass himself, has been Bronco’s manservant for as long as anyone can remember. Numbers can explain every new tax law, but he just can’t get the hang of pro football.

Planning the various arrival times is critical; it’s a system that would make any military planner proud. Without question, the kegs must be brought in at least four hours before the game starts so there will be enough time to chill them in large tubs of ice. Appetizers should arrive no later than two hours before kick-off so the group can partake of them, digest them and still leave time to build up their appetites for the main courses and dessert. The burgers and brats are next, approximately one hour before the National Anthem is played. This leaves plenty of time for them to simmer on the grill until they reach the perfect degree of being burned. No rare meat for these guys. That’s like eating sushi or quiche, which just don’t belong here.

What’s left? Nothing except to watch the game. Hopefully, it won’t be another anti-climatic blow-out that’s over by half-time. The Walrus gets bored easily. When this is done, all he has to look forward to is the annual party he throws when ESPN broadcasts the NFL draft in April. And, be honest, does anyone except the Walrus and Chris Berman really care that in the fifth round, the Arizona Cardinals drafted an outside linebacker from Southwest Texas State Southern Baptist University?

Want to become an eModel? eModel Magazine is currently looking for models for upcoming issues of our digital e-zine. submit a picture to us by email by clicking Casting

That Time of the Year for Football Fans By Arnie Weisberg

That Time of the Year for Football Fans
By Arnie Weisberg