Chasing the Matrix by A.
Mordente
On March
31st in the year 1999, Keanu Reeves was given a choice: swallow
the blue Mike and Ike to stay in Wonderland, exploring the depths
of the rabbit hole, or, take the red Mike and Ike to forget
the whole thing. At the time, moviegoers rejoiced when he chose
to take the red pill. Audiences cheered when Zion’s new
savior ran up walls, karate-chopped agents, bent spoons, and
of course, overcame death to begin his path of freeing minds
and flying around like a better dressed Superman. The world
was buzzing with rumors about the inevitable sequels and where
they would take our favorite, emotionless hero boy and his eerily
identical love interest. Could Neo live up to his potential
and save the dwindling human population from certain destruction
at the hands (or tentacles) of the insect-like robot army attacking
them? What would his new coat look like? New sunglasses? Would
Trinity ever smile? Would Morpheus get a new acne scar?
And then, in 2003, after painful years
of waiting amongst rumors of the possible sex change operation
of one of the ever elusive Wachowskis, movie theaters opened
their doors to a stampede of elated techno geeks foaming at
the mouth for the next piece of the Matrix puzzle. The result
was 138 minutes of frustration upon frustration upon disappointment.
Still, the more die-hard of fans did not despair. Surely the
next installment would answer all questions and faith would
once again be restored in the universe of the Matrix.
After a much shorter and less painful
wait, tickets were available for the final installment in
Neo’s declining saga. Excitement and hope were again
high as people flooded theaters expecting all loose ends to
be tied together. The result, unfortunately, was a poorly
scripted turd, full of thinly veiled religious innuendo that
left even the most casual viewer with the will to do nothing
but drink a trough of Old Granddad and roll around in a dumpster
screaming “WHY?”
After cursing Neo for choosing that
red pill and wishing that there were a blue pill that we could
take to erase the pain of the two sequels, our wounds began
to heal. Some of us even went so far as to lay down our hard
earned cash to bring home embarrassingly bad video games such
as “Enter the Matrix” and the flop of all flops
“The Matrix Online,” hoping against hope to catch
a glimpse of that rare excitement experienced in the first
film.
Now, with the release of Shiny Entertainment’s
“Matrix: The Path Of Neo,” scorned ex-fans have
again been filled with skeptical hope. This time we have finally
been given the opportunity to play as Neo and to live out
the movies instead of passively watching them. The game spans
all three of the films and fills in some gaps along the way.
The only problem is that they end up changing certain key
facets of the films, thus removing the enjoyable aspects of
living the moments we all know and love. Even with a crappy
auto-aim system and clumsy gunplay, the game still isn’t
all that bad; but after chasing the excellence of the original
“Matrix” for so long, this mediocre offering doesn’t
even come close to doing the job. Perhaps it can serve another
purpose by ending this pathetic cycle of hoping, buying, and
dying.
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